Elon Musk’s ambitious claim that over a million people could inhabit Mars in 25 years seems implausible, given the planet’s harsh conditions, including extreme temperatures, high radiation, and logistical challenges for housing and food supply. Despite Musk’s history of achieving extraordinary feats, the barriers to colonizing Mars raise skepticism. Additionally, societal issues like rising theft rates are discussed, accompanied by humorous anecdotes, while the joy of aging is reflected upon with nostalgia for favorite shows. Finally, unconventional solutions to local wildlife problems are proposed.
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Elon Musk a récemment annoncé qu’un million de personnes pourraient vivre sur Mars dans 25 ans, une promesse jugée peu réaliste face aux conditions extrêmes de la planète. En plus des défis logistiques pour le logement et l’alimentation, des anecdotes humoristiques sur l’augmentation du vol dans la société sont mentionnées, ainsi qu’une réflexion nostalgique sur le plaisir de vieillir et revivre d’anciennes émissions. Enfin, des solutions inattendues aux problèmes de la faune locale sont proposées.
WHEN Elon Musk recently expressed his ambition for over a million individuals to inhabit Mars within the next 25 years, I couldn’t help but think, « Really, Elon? »
Yet, Musk has a track record of turning his grand plans into reality.
Just last month, he revealed a competing phone to Apple’s, presented a robot designed to fetch slippers, and launched a self-driving taxi—all in a single week.
He’s truly the definition of an overachiever.
It might be easy to view him merely as a spokesperson for these projects.
However, he was the one who originally proposed catching the massive rocket in its gantry rather than attaching cumbersome legs to it.
He was directly involved in the design phases.
How do we know? He appears in podcasts, gives speeches, supports Trump, promotes my favorite beer, Hawkstone, and manages both Tesla and X.
It almost seems as if there are multiple versions of him.
But even if there were a hundred of him, the notion of establishing a million Martians by next Tuesday still seems implausible.
Has he not seen Arnold Schwarzenegger in Total Recall?
In that case, falling through a window results in skin melting and eyes swelling.
The reality is scarcely better. The radiation on Mars is about 50 times greater than that on Earth.
Reproducing under such conditions would be quite the challenge; after all, your genitalia might deteriorate long before any potential offspring emerged.
Then there’s the issue of temperature.
While there are some lovely days at 70 degrees Fahrenheit, most of the time it’s around minus 200.
And let’s not forget the strong winds, capable of enveloping the planet in massive dust storms.
Next comes the challenge of housing a million people.
That’s equivalent to the population of Birmingham.
Constructing a city of that scale in such conditions seems nearly impossible, especially while battling frostbite and dust obscuring your vision.
And how do you transport all the necessary materials up there?
Churches are heavy. Libraries are too.
As for food, while Matt Damon managed to grow potatoes, I’m doubtful that beef could ever be available.
It would require taking a cow and a bull to space.
And expect them to master the anti-gravity toilets.
However, let’s say Elon finds solutions to all these hurdles, which, considering his history, isn’t entirely out of the question.
Where will he locate a million volunteers?
Essentially, what he’s suggesting is: “Would you like to leave Earth and spend your life in the frigid cold, subsisting on potatoes while undergoing bizarre mutational changes?”
That’s akin to asking someone in St Tropez: “Would you trade this for life in Siberia?”
Most would decline.
NICKED . . . CHEDDAR
There once was a time when thieves sought gold, jewelry, or cash.
This past weekend, however, someone swiped £300,000 worth of Cheddar cheese.
Cheese, can you believe it?
And that’s just the start of it.
I figured that when newsagents stopped putting Men’s magazines on display, shoplifting would decrease.
But that hasn’t happened.
Now, they steal anything that isn’t secured.
Last year, this resulted in £1.8 billion lost to retailers due to theft.
The police seem powerless while focusing on training initiatives that seem to ignore pressing issues.
Guess how many beer glasses vanish from my pub weekly?
Nope, you’re way off. It’s 400.
Which means we lose 80 glasses everyday, along with light bulbs from restrooms and even urinal traps.
This week, someone made off with £200 worth of cooking oil. It’s rampant and spreading.
People are even stealing collection tins for charity, pets, and, as I mentioned previously, car doors.
And this trend won’t change since the likelihood of capture is minimal, and even if caught, the consequences are non-existent.
Punishment might affect their mental health.
Besides, as per Starmer, it